Man, I hate this day. Everything's been going wrong.. Had a quarrel with sister who has practically no manners towards my mother. Who does she think she is?! Shouting at my mother like as if she was her maid. Should have just slapped her, grabbed her hair and drag her across the floor! Damn her!! Don't think that just because you were born 3 years older than me that I will have to respect you. There's no such thing in my world. You want respect? Earn it! Arrgh!
Ran out of the house after screaming at sister. I called SW. He was busy playing games. I was pissed off and upset. After hearing my quarrel in the house, he still acts nonchalently. Right. So now I'm not worth listening to. So I should just drop dead. I felt like no one cared about my feelings. Not at all. wth. I hung up the call, telling him to play his game. Smsed him, saying that I hated him for not caring at all. Cried all the way to his house. He wasn't at home. Crap. I felt even worse now. When he finally came back, which was around 30 minutes later, he seemed alright. He even commented on how his monkey (in the game) had turned from orange to white. (-.-)
Everything seemed to be getting better as the day passed by. I went to touch the remaining living hamster (used to have 2 other hamsters. But they died, under unforeseen circumstances). Guess what happened? It turned around, jumped and bit my finger for 2 whole seconds! Wth! Now everyone and everything is going against me. Right. So it's suppose to be 'Hate-Esther- Day'.
The rest of the day went by, WITHOUT any misfortune befalling upon me. SW sent me home after watching Jacky Wu's show. What happens after is the worst thing I ever experienced. I was going to sleep when he told me that that one sms hurt him. A LOT. I had forgotten about that sms, and I felt very guilty. I knew that I was always throwing my temper at him, treating him like a punching bag. I knew all of these. But I still commit the same mistake. I cried until my head painfully throbbed throughout my sleep. I really can't forgive myself. I keep telling myself not to hurt him. But I still do, time after time. I'm such a lousy girlfriend... I think I'm going crazy with all hurtful words flashing through my mind. I deserve such a plight. Crap. I should just stay away from everyone. I bite at everyone, even those close to me. Damn me. Don't wish to talk anymore..
The Melody was Played at 11:30 PM
Profile
Esther Tay Yan Ching
Ngee Ann Poly, Logistics Year 3
07 October 1989
etyc60@hotmail.com
Music
Loves
my boyfriend, SW
sleeping..
food! x3
black and white
Hates
backstabbers
free loaders
Wishes
good grades(at least a 3.2 GPA)
good relationship with SW
psp or mp3 player
SW gets good grades
